The Rumple and the Rumpus
by estie793
Summary: Rumpleteazer has a stalker... she thinks. She also thinks she's in love with him. The problem is, she has no idea who the tom really is! Most likey a one shot for my sister, Alice. I own nothing.


The Rumple and the Rumpus  
>Rumpleteazer had a stalker. Well, she didn't know for sure that he was stalking her, but it was awfully convenient for him to be there every single time she was in trouble. Every time she went looting without Mungojerrie, she was liable to get caught by some grouchy human, or be chased by a pollicle. It was inevitable. Then he would come out of nowhere and save her.<br>Yes, Rumpleteazer's stalker was indeed, the Great Rumpus Cat. She couldn't count how many times he had saved her. Admittedly, she had been going off without Jerrie and looking for trouble to get into lately, just so she could see him.  
>That was what she was doing right now, in fact. Jerrie had told her that he and Plato were going on a double date with their queens, so she'd have the den to herself. She had put on the act, whining, pouting, pestering her littermate to let her come along, but on the inside, she was grinning. If Jerrie had a night with dear little Jemima planned, he'd be gone long enough for her to see... Him.<br>So, almost as soon as Mungojerrie abandoned the den to meet Jemima, Plato, and Victoria, Teazer grabbed her old looting sack and stole quietly out of the junkyard. She knew which house she would go to tonight. It wasn't far off, only a few blocks. This house was inhabited by the grouchiest humans on the face of the earth. They hated cats, and even had three nasty pekes and one poofy pom to scare cats away. She would get in trouble, he would come rescue her, and all would be well. They would walk, and talk, and just be together for a little while like they always did. She would pepper him with questions that he would never answer, while all the while he learned more about her. Still, her time spent with him was always enjoyable, and with this thought, she reached the front yard of the house.  
>She pranced through the lawn and hopped up onto the windowsill, easily sliding the glass barrier open and then gracefully leaping onto the dining room table. She crept to the kitchen and sniffed for any trace of what had been made for supper. The smell of dirty peke filled her nose instead. Ugh! But, the dirty humans had left a pan on the stove, and that was surely a good sign. Stealing around the sleeping pekes, Teazer made her way to the stove to investigate what food might have been left for her.<br>What? What was this blasphemy? Vegetables? There wasn't even any cheese or egg for her to pick out and eat. Her stomach rumbled in disappointment.  
>Well, since there wasn't any food, she may as well take the china from the dining room, wake the pom, and let him rescue her.<br>Her stealing was accomplished quickly and quietly, and she started her hunt for the yipping pooch. Where was it, stupid little thing? It normally slept on a lacy pillow at the bottom of the stairs, but it wasn't there tonight. Annoyed, Teazer rolled her eyes and started up the stairs with quickness and silence that being an agent of Macavity had lent her. She located the pom quickly enough, but was surprised. It was on the human's bed. This was new. Why was it up there instead of on her pillow where it belonged? No matter. Teazer would wake it, then escape through the window, and he would be there to make sure she was fine.  
>The calico queen climbed onto the king sized bed and just stared at the pom for a moment, the brown and white fur, and the mashed up little face... It was so ugly. And it was staring back at Teazer. A growl came from its throat, followed by shrill yipping. Rumpleteazer was taken by surprise. She had been so absorbed in nearly feeling sorry for the pom that she was unaware she had awakened it! Forgetting her sack, she darted back downstairs, but by now, it was too late. The pom had wakened the pekes, and all three of them were waiting for Rumpleteazer by the open window! The pom was chasing her, and the fat, clumsy humans were following. This wasn't supposed to happen! It had been a long time since she had actually been in real trouble!<br>"Get it! Get it!" the pom barked. "Get it before it escapes!"  
>The three pekes growled low, and one snapped his jaws at her. She ran back through the house with all six occupants of the house right behind her. This was bad. They were slower than her, but much larger in size and numbers. They were going to catch her if she didn't find a way out soon!<br>And then, suddenly, he was there. All claws and teeth and bright, angry eyes. He hissed and clawed one of the pekes across the face and hopped on the others back, digging his claws into it, making the peke yelp in pain. The other peke took a hesitant snap, but the Rumpus Cat just hissed and sent him running. The hair on his back bristled as he turned to the pom and the humans.  
>"Go," he told Teazer. "I'll be right behind you."<br>And so, Teazer ran, making her escape quickly. She could hear him behind her, but she didn't stop running until she was out of sight of the house.  
>When she finally did stop, he took her paw. "Stupid, Teaze. That was really stupid."<br>"Well, Oi'm sorry! Oi didn't know the pom ain't sleepin' on t' stupid pillow anymore!"

"Teaze, I hate that accent. I'm not Macavity. Just talk normally."  
>She smiled and moved a little closer to him. "An' 'ow does it make you feel? Known' you been rescuin' an agent o' the Napoleon o' Crime?"<br>"Stop it. Be a proper queen."  
>"Oh, alright."<br>He smiled and she purred when he gently nuzzled her head. "It makes me feel like a traitor to any and all things good. But I like it."  
>"So, were you following me again tonight, or were you just in the neighborhood?"<br>"Someone has to keep an eye on you when your brother's gone."  
>Maybe she would actually get him to reveal something about himself tonight! "And how did you know Mungojerrie would be gone?"<br>"I have my sources," he said coolly.  
>"And those sources would be...?" she prompted.<br>He grabbed her waist and kissed her. "None of your business." He kissed her cheek before turning to continue their walk.  
>"You can't just do that and walk away!" she cried, catching up to him and yanking his tail.<p>

"Ow," he casually complained, pulling it out of her grasp. "Fine then, what do you want me to do."  
>Rumpleteazer's stomach did the demanding for her by growling loudly at that moment.<br>Rumpus looked at her sympathetically. "You haven't eaten all day. Come on, I happen to know a house where the humans had some salmon. Let's go."  
>Rumpleteazer's eyes widened in excitement. "You mean we're gonna steal it?" she exclaimed gleefully.<br>He batted her head with his paw. "No, stupid. They threw it out. We'll get it out of the garbage can."  
>Teazer's ears dropped closer to her head after her initial excitement quelled.<br>"You're so cute when you do that," Rumpus informed her.  
>"I'm cute all the time."<br>"True."  
>They found the house, located the garbage can, and made a feast of the tossed salmon. Then they went to lay on the rooftop and look at the moon.<br>"Rumpus?"  
>"Yeah, Teaze?"<br>She sighed and laid her head on his shoulder. "I think I'm in love with you."  
>"I... I think I'm in love with you too. I know I'm in love with you."<br>She snuggled even closer to him, entwining her tail with his. "Then why won't you tell me who you really are, or where you came from, or anything?"  
>He sighed. "I can't. At least... Not right now."<br>"Why?"  
>He turned over so he was lying on his back and looked up at her. "Because. If Macavity found out who I was, he would probably make you suffer to make me suffer. He's tried already."<br>Teazer nodded somberly. She remembered all too well the ropes and henchcats Macavity had used to lure Rumpus out of hiding just a few months ago.  
>"Why do you still work for him when he does things like that to you?"<br>She looked away uncomfortably and fingered her pearl collar.  
>Rumpus understood. "There's a better way to get those shiny things you love so much. I... I could get them for you, you know. Without stealing."<br>"It's not just the stuff... It the stealing. It's fun. It's what Jerrie and I have always done."  
>"Jenny and Skimble must be so proud."<br>Rumpleteazer cocked an eyebrow and glared suspiciously. "Now I know you're a stalker. I've never once told you who my parents are!"  
>Rumpus replied, "It's not hard to figure out."<br>"You're a stalker," she persisted.  
>"Alright," he agreed. "I'm a stalker. I admit it! I'm such a stalker that last night, I came into your den and kissed you while you were asleep."<br>She laughed. "You did not!"  
>"You're right."<br>"Can I kiss you now?"  
>"It's, 'may I kiss you,' and yes, you may."<br>So she did, but he pulled away quickly, his ears twitching and his eyes becoming larger.  
>"Hey... I've gotta go. I'll see you later, Teaze."<br>She sighed in disappointment. "Yeah, whatever." and then he was gone. A pollicle trying to attack a helpless kitten, probably. This was part of being with him, she knew. She would always have to give him up when someone else was in need. It was hard. Rumpleteazer was not, by any means, a sharing cat. She liked what she had and she wanted to keep it to herself. But with him, she couldn't. Perhaps it was good for her, not being able to selfishly hold him all the time. Still, she didn't like it.

After saving the little tom kit, the Rumpus Cat headed back to the Junkyard. It was likely that Rumpleteazer had already gone to bed, so he felt no need to pace himself. Once he reached the fence, he took off his super cat garb and stashed it in it's usual place in the pine bushes. Once again, he was just plain Admetus. Nothing special, nothing extraordinary. Just good ol' Admetus. Who was supposed to be too quiet to speak to Rumpleteazer, the loud, bad girl of the tribe. 'She almost got me to tell her tonight,' he mused. 'This is getting to be slightly dangerous. But I love her so much!' He reminded himself that he would always have to stay shy around her, just to keep her in the dark. Plato already knew about who the Rumpus Cat really was; he didn't want too many others knowing. It was dangerous with Macavity still out there.  
>She kept to the quieter roads on her way back to the junkyard, and she walked slowly. When she finally reached the entrance, she saw someone else coming in as well.<br>"Oi! Admetus!" she cried. "Wotcha doin' out so late?"  
>The quiet tom looked at her with wide eyes. "Uh... Um... Mousing? I was out mousing?"<br>"You sure?" she teased. "You don sound sure."  
>"I... I'm sure. What were you doing out?"<br>"Pinchin' stuff."  
>Admetus looked at the ground. "Oh." He paused and they walked into the junkyard together. "T-t-Teazer?" he stuttered.<br>"Whot?"  
>"Um, why do you Mungo use those funny accents?"<br>She gave him an odd look. "Whoi? Because Oi want ta!"  
>Admetus looked away, seemingly afraid. "Well, it sorta makes you sound... Rough. I think... Well... I'd like to hear you sound like a proper queen." As soon as those words left his mouth, he knew he was in trouble. Teazer had stopped walking, and there was a small hint of recognition on her face.<br>Rumpleteazer's ears twitched, and her eyes widened. "Addie..." she dropped the accent. "Where were you tonight? Really?"  
>"M-mousing! I told you!" The gray tom tried to back away as the young queen came towards him.<br>"Mousing, huh? Your breath smells like salmon."  
>Admetus' eyes got wide and he backed away from her so fast he tripped over his own feet. "N-no it doesn't! You're just tired."<br>"Addie, I'm not tired." She smirked. He was floundering. Could it be that the identity of the Great Rumpus Cat had resided just below her nose all this time? Could it be that quiet, shy Admetus was the Tom she so looked forward to seeing? It did make sense. She couldn't ever remember Admetus being around whenever the Rumpus Cat happened to be in the junkyard. Then again, most of the tribe could ever remember Admetus being anywhere, he was so quiet.  
>It seemed so strange. Rumpus was so different! Rumpleteazer had to know for sure if it was really him. She quickly leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips.<br>"Addie..." she whispered uncertainly. "Are you... Are you him? I won't tell anyone."  
>Admetus didn't say anything. She knew that she had finally found him though. Admetus smelled like him, Admetus tasted like him, and now, looking into his eyes, she knew for sure.<br>"Oh... Addie!" she hugged him, and he hugged her back at last.

"Teaze, you can't tell."

"I won't," she whispered. "I won't."


End file.
